Denise's Blog
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Practicing A “Strong Ask”
“Denise, put forth a STRONG ASK,” says one of my ever so wise business mentors, while guiding me in birthing a program near and dear to my heart. Her words of wisdom reverberate over and over, sending ripples of awareness throughout, leading me to explore more deeply what a STRONG ASK is for me.
When I ask God for a healing for myself or another, I do that with a STRONG ASK. Often on my knees, I imagine connecting directly with God energy, plus a council consisting of the Blessed Mother, Padre Pio, Archangel Michael, Jesus, and a few others I grew up with. And when I ask them to intervene, to bless a situation, I ask with my whole heart. And this ASK is one I can feel with my whole body. It is an “ask” rooted in deep feeling from a heart request. A distinct feeling washes over me letting me know I have been heard. Yes, this is a STRONG ASK.
This gets me to wondering if a STRONG ASK, is an ask filtered through the heart, connected to Source energy? That is sounding right for me. An ask of deep desire, pure intention, sent as a request on the wings of angels.
Yes, a STRONG ASK, is void of all my mind chatter. Mind chatter left over from childhood declaring “it is a sign of weakness to ask for help,” or “if you want it done right do it yourself,” or “projecting rejection on the ask before it ever gets asked,” clog up my flow in asking. Or, a moldy belief that “women shouldn’t ask, but wait to be asked.”
Since my mentor lit up my awareness around a strong ask, I’ve been practicing. I have a true story to share with you about a strong ask related to money.
A little background to help out here. About two years ago, our beloved investment advisor retired. A new person took over the management of his firm and we had hoped it would be a good fit for us. It wasn’t a good fit. Lots of fear set in for me that my husband and I would not meet our investment goals over this important next phase of our lives.
My anxiety was growing. My inner knowing was speaking loudly to me, “this is not the right fit. you have enough evidence this isn’t the right fit. move forward.” I appreciated my decreasing capacity to stay in a situation that wasn’t right for me, for us.
I had many talks with the Universe that went “please help us find a person who can help us, a firm of smarts, creativity, similar values and please let this happen soon.”
Then this past year, I gave a talk to a group of financial advisors at their annual get together and ended up staying for the weekend with them. I really connected with one advisor and philosophy of the firm, heart to heart. Tanya imaginatively appeared on my shoulder, loudly whispering in my ear, put forth a STRONG ASK here Denise. So I did, with my full heart. I asked to become one of their clients with my whole heart.
The response back was, “I am so sorry, we take clients with portfolios of three million or higher.” While disappointed and honoring of this boundary at the same time, I asked again. This time for three best recommendations for advisors who take clients with the amount we had in our portfolio.
When I got home from this annual get together, I received an email from this advisor, that said, “I will be glad to work with you and your husband if this is still something you desire. We have like minded values and that is something I value and something that connects us in a wonderful way.”
So, here we are now, working with a firm of heart centered, value based folks with a great reputation. We feel deeply cared for. This all came about from a STRONG ASK. An “ask” that came from my heart. And, a “yes” came from this firm’s heart.
I am learning. Practicing “asking” on the canvas of my life, with my whole heart for what I want and need. It feels cleaner, more spiritually aligned with who I really am, and I believe the curiosity in this exploration of a STRONG ASK, will open me in a new way, a more expansive way. This teaching is a blessing beyond measure. Thank you wise woman Tanya, for helping me to deepen into a STRONG ASK from my heart in all the arenas of my life.
What is a STRONG ASK for you? What arena of your life do you easily engage in a strong ask? What arena of your life is your ask a bit weaker? I would love to hear from you.
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Hi Denise,
Long long time. Just wanted to drop a note to tell you that this is a wonderful piece. I hope you and Greg are doing wonderfully. If ever it works let’s meet. Otherwise you are always in my thoughts and prayers.
Much love,
Naima